Join me on my trip around the world in search of a better life, the secrets of game, modern society and more. It’s a trip back from ground zero, a climb out of the gutter and a journey back to the top. Along the way, I want to lay bare some of the things that took me 40 years and a lot of fuck ups to learn.
Just two years ago I rolled back into England dishevelled, damn near broken, with a single suitcase to my name. I slept in the airport the night before. I couldn’t even afford a roach motel.
In the space of a few years I had earned it, lost it, earned it again and then blown it all in one reckless last ditch gamble.
I found my way to the top of a stupid competitive industry, twice, just by naturally getting away with it and skatinng through life. But when I fell, I fell hard.
The price of failure
My epic failure cost me my all of my worldly goods and money, but that’s just stuff. It also reduced my self esteem to ashes.
Maybe I had it too easy. Maybe I shouldn’t have taken my life of flying First Class around the world driving Bugatti Veyrons, Pagani Zondas and RenaultF1 cars for granted. Maybe the ‘grounding’ I got following the F1 circus from Australia to Brazil a the age of 24 wasn’t quite the trenches of warfare. Maybe I shouldn’t have expected a line of hot girlfriends.
Maybe I needed balancing out.
When it started to unpick at the seams I found I wasn’t quite as suave as I thought. I crashed and burned so hard I wasn’t sure I could ever come back.
Do not date BPD girls, ever, trust me
And I wasn’t even at rock bottom yet. I still had a year-long affair with a Borderline Personality Disorder girl to come, which would eviscerate most guys in that mental state.
I give myself credit for surviving at least.
This isn’t rock bottom, today isn’t even close. At rock bottom I slept for a week and cuddled a the family dog. At rock bottom I worked on a content mill to get money coming, any money. I arrived back in England penniless, borrowed a five-year-old laptop that shut down every hour and earned enough at a penny a word to fund the fight back from sub zero.
This is the comeback trail.
The spirit animal meant something to me
I remember moving into a bedsit so grimy I didn’t take one picture of it. I had no furniture, I had nothing. But I was walking through Plymouth and I spotted this little lion in the market.
He cost me £3, which cut into the food budget that week, but he has paid me back time and again. He still takes pride of place in my lounge, halfway across the world.
This little lion is just a part of the story. I learned so much that I figure I have to pass it on
I lost Alpha so long ago I’m not even sure what direction it went. So to get back there, to take even one of you with me, I’ve pretty much got to map it out.
Knowing you know nothing is the wisest move of all
That means sitting back and accepting I don’t know a fucking thing. That means looking at goals and figuring where to go with them. It means redefining what I want from my life at 40 years old and it means rebuilding my values.
It means deconstructing what it is to be an Alpha male, to rebuild myself. Natural isn’t going to cut it this time around. I’m going to need to figure it out.
If I can do it for you, too, then awesome. You’ll see the system evolve, you’ll know it’s not some half-baked ebook culled from 10 others.
It will mean something.
Join me on my Alpha Reboot. Log in above and join me on this madcap journey to be the best I can be. I promise you’ll learn things that took me a lifetime to figure out and we’ll have some fun along the way.
It will be enlightening, it will be useful and it’s probably going to get weird!