Are our dicks really getting bigger? Or is the average penis size based on lies?

A new study suggests that the average British penis size has grown substantially during the last year. That sounds sketchy to us.

 

 

Last year, condom company SKYN commissioned Kings College London to survey 15,521 men. They found that the average penis was 5.16 inches.

 

 

How big is the average penis now?

 

 

Just one year later, a follow-up study of 18-34-year-old men, by the same institution, revealed that the average size is now 6.1 inches.

 

 

So, what has changed? How has the average penis got a whole inch bigger? We think we have the answer.

 

 

In the first study, the researchers actually measured the men in question. In the second, they filled out an online form. So basically, in news that will surprise absolutely fucking nobody, men exaggerate the size of their cock.

 

 

Men lie about penis size? Really?!

 

 

They could be pressing the ruler in, just to ‘make sure’ they get to the base. They could be measuring the bottom from somewhere deep in the nutsack or they could just be changing the numbers. But what we have here is a clear case of men giving themselves the benefit of the doubt on an epic scale.

 

 

Another recent study showed that the optimum length is 6.2 inches. So even when we blatantly lie about things, men still don’t quite measure up to women’s expectations.

 

 

Except me, obviously. I’m hung like a horse…

 

 

How do you measure your penis?

 

 

Every man, at some point or another, has wondered exactly how to measure your penis. Well, although it’s a bit weird, we’re happy to help.

 

 

Get fully hard anyway you like, whether that’s watching midget and donkey porn or gently caressing yourself to a fully-clothed picture of your wife on your wedding day. Whatever floats your boat.

 

 

Now, take a ruler, push your penis down so it’s perpendicular to your body and measure the top. Push the ruler in slightly, against the pelvic bone, which compensates for the layer of fat and pubic hair that can cruelly distort the results.

 

 

Penis size can vary dramatically

 

That’s pretty much it. Do yourself a favor and measure yourself on a ‘good day’. We know that sometimes it looks fucking huge and sometimes, well, not so much. Room temperature, the last time you had sex and how horny you are can all have a massive impact on your size. It will vary, so don’t get too hung up on this.

 

 

Do yourself another favor and don’t post the results on Facebook and Twitter.

 

 

If you’re still struggling, here’s a helpful video from HBO.

 

 

 

 

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