How To Spot (And Avoid) A Feminist!

Crazy woman, how to spot and avoid a feminist


When you really think about it, you’re never going to get anywhere dating a feminist.


They have become terrible, screechy, entitled babies who want to give nothing and take everything. That is pretty much the definition of a shitty human being.


They have all the crazy biological wiring, and now some deep-seated man hating imperative that basically makes them impossible.


We can’t fix this. It’s just too big a job.


Third Wave Feminists Are Cat Ladies In Waiting


We need to wait patiently while this generation of Third Wave Feminists grow old, bitter and alone with their cats.


It will happen, but before the we’ve got a shitload of articles to wade through that will all say: “Where have all the good men gone?”


Yes, the messed up thing is that we already know it will all be our fault. But we can live with that.


What you can’t live with, under any circumstances, is an angry feminist.



Male Feminists Are Spineless Bitches


Don’t support this fucking madness. Let it wither and die on the vine as women realise the consequences of their actions and turn on their own.


They will, and it’s going to happen sooner than you think.


But if you’ve ever said you’re a male feminist, or your support feminism, or you’re an ally, then grab yourself by the throat and choke yourself.


Say you’re in favor of equality. Say you love the idea of equal rights. But do not jump on this Feminazi train straight to Hell.


It will never get you laid. And if it does, you’ll regret it.


Don’t Be Her Bitch


At the very best you’ll get to be  her subordinate bitch. You can listen to her whine about the injustice of it all when you come back from a day at work and have to clean the house because what are you? A Misogynist pig?!


At worst you’ll end up a broken man, wishing for the sweet embrace of death to take you from this wicked witch.


But there’s a better way. Learn to spot and avoid feminists.


You’ll lead a happier life.


So, what are the telltale signs?


1. Candy floss color hair, often short.


Any variation or combination of pink, blue or green hair is an instant red flag.


It used to be a dead giveaway for Borderline Personality Disorder, also known as chronic attention whore syndrome. But the feminists, who often seem to have the BPD eyes themselves, have pretty much co-opted this one.


So bright pink or blue hair, particularly if it’s styled into a boyish flick, are about as clear a sign you’ll get you’re dealing with a raging nutbar.


Run away…


Nerd glasses, a dangerous sign of a feminist


2. Nerd glasses


Yes, feminists are so utterly unique that they end up wearing a uniform.


Women with short hair and nerd glasses have, reportedly, a 125% chance of remembering a casual sexual encounter as rape.


You know the ones, they’re dressed like sluts but they’ve gone for a bit of geek chic up top to balance it all out?


Avoid them.



Picture ‘credit’: Destiny M/Youtube


3. Hairy Pits


If a woman has hairy pits on show then she’s basically challenging you to find her unattractive.


Challenge accepted.


It’s just a total middle finger to societal standards and any attempt to ‘normalize’ unshaven pits should be greeted with the contempt it so clearly deserves.


It’s a pointless, screaming protest. It’s a demand that the whole world bends to their will and changes their very interpretation of beauty to accommodate these spoilt, whiny babies.


If they have blue or pink armpit hair then just forget it. Tap out.



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‘Oh wow, I love your confidence!’


4. She Fat


The tragic fact is that too many young American women are fat these days. Yup, fat. Not big boned, not cursed by genetics, not healthy at any size. They are fat.


But the truth is that a fat girl either has no self-respect or shitty role models in life.


So, she’s either going to become a cellulitey Instagram ‘model’ and tell us we have to think she’s pretty or we’re bigots, or she’ll go full feminist and ‘my body, my rights’.


Either way, you don’t want any part of that train wreck. Depression, even more cats and Diabetes lie in her future. Make sure you’re not there to hold her foot.



Women tattoos

5. Visible Tattoos/Scars


It is not clever or classy to get a tattoo on your neck, face or arms. It just shows a spectacular lack of forward planning.


Cutting yourself at any stage of life is also maybe a sign that you’re not the most balanced individual. You are not ‘totally over it’ now, you’re just keeping in the crazy.


Tattoos to look out for above all others include a semi-colon, which is a way to announce to the world you tried to kill yourself.


Think about this for a moment: a permanent tattoo that can never be removed that says it all got too much and I tried to top myself…


Why would you want that?


It’s just another attempt to stand out, to get attention and to be a victim. It fits the feminist manifesto perfectly.




6. The Gender Studies Bitch


You have to delve slightly deeper than the surface and actually ask them a question. But any girl doing gender studies, women’s studies, psychology or anything in that sector just isn’t worth knowing.


The Psychology girls can be a mixed bag of issues, but most of them are doing the course to ‘understand themselves’. Actually, they’ll use the most trite, basic and low-hanging psychological fruit to enable their shitty behavior and convince everybody around them that they are actually going mad.


It’s just another flavor of:”This is all your fault.”


The Gender Studies girls, though, they’re going to be a walking nightmare.


It will be a non-stop ball of oppression, especially when they can’t get a job because every employer has wised up to the fact that self-confessed feminists are going to be constant drama and an inevitable court case.



7. The Single Mother


Now not all single mothers are feminists, but you better believe that a lot of them turn that way after Chad rides off into the sunset and leaves them to raise his crotchspawn.


They’re not real feminists, of course. But then hardly any of them are anymore. No, they just really hate men and want a way to vent.


So watch out for the single mother who ‘don’t need no man,’ because she does, but she hates you for it at the same time. There is literally no way to win with this chick, apart from never to play the game.




8. Dungarees


At this point, they’ve gone so hardcore that they probably can’t speak to you without spitting patriarchy in your face and looking at you with those incredulous, victimized, soulless eyes.


But yeah, dungarees were the lesbian uniform of choice and the dykes are probably a bit pissed off at these lightweight feminists for stealing their shiz.


Either way, it’s a red flag for men to walk away.


They’re basically a drunken night away from going full lesbian if they wear these in public.




9. Doc Martens


This was another gay and lesbian one that seems to have been co-opted by angry feminists who show how much they hate men by dressing like them.


If they’re wearing Doc Martens, they’re more or less drinking from the furry cup anyway at that point. So focus on the other points first.




10. Just Ask Them


If you are in any doubt, just ask them: “What do you think about modern day feminism?”


She’ll either wince, ashamed of the harpies that have come to represent her own gender, or she’ll start going on about the patriarchy and the gender pay gap.


Either way, you know what you have to do.


Do you know any more signs to look out for? Let us know in the comments!







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