Do you ever wish you could give yourself a shot of confidence?
I’m not talking about necking tequila at the bar before heading over to talk to a 10. I’m talking real-life instant confidence that you can access any time, any place.
This is the magic of the NLP anchor. It’s a way to harness your absolute best day, you on top form, and put yourself right in the groove whenever you need to be there. You literally anchor those emotions to a physical act.
You might have heard of anchors in the PUA and game community, which is a little dodgier and is designed to elicit a positive reaction in the girl.
We’re going to do those, too. But honestly if you get your own head 100% in the game the you shouldn’t need to mess with someone else’s. Ever. Get yourself on point, other people will fall into line.
An NLP anchor is great for stress relief
If you’re stressed and you’ve got a job interview, you’ve got a big date and you feel like throwing up or you’ve got to talk in front of a crowd, this can really work for you.
Now this little lifehack isn’t going to fix every single problem. But if you practice it, make it a part of your life and use it every time you could do with a dose of bravery then you’ll be amazed. It becomes second nature.
If you set it right in the first place, this trick will serve you well. Once it’s set you can fire it any time.
Just relax, or use hypnosis
First you have a choice. You can try to simply relax, but if there’s one long-term gift I can give you then it’s the gift of guided meditation. Call it hypnosis if you like, it doesn’t really make a difference.
The whole point is you need to get in to a relaxed, suggestible state. That’s because an anchor relies on suggestion. So you can close your eyes, breathe deep and relax, or you can make use of the tools that are out there.
Michael Sealey is great, but for things like this I’m going to give you another secret weapon for life. Grace Smith charges $47 a month right now and she’s worth every penny, but there are some Youtube recordings dotted around the place from her early hypnosis in a bedroom days.
For this exercise, one of the freebies will do just fine.
So thank Grace and if she rocks your world then consider signing up for her monthly deal. It isn’t an affiliate deal, she doesn’t have one. I just think she’s good.
Use this one first:
1. Relax, really relax like you never have before
Follow Grace as she talks you down. You can get totally engrossed if you want and do your think at the end, but generally you’ll find it works best if you start to tune out the recording when you’re deeply relaxed and move on to stage two.
2. Remember your moment
Now you need to picture a time when you were the boss, when absolutely everything went your way. It can be the day you had the most mind-blowing sex of your life. It can be when you scored a 40-yard screamer, or threw a touchdown pass in the dying seconds of a friendly game.
It can be when your ex-wife said yes to the ring or it can be when you were slaying everyone on the pool table over some beers.
It can be anything, as long as it made you feel like a million dollars. If that moment put you on top of the world, just that moment, then grab it. That’s your special feeling.
3. Paint a picture in your mind
Don’t just think in vague terms. Get down to specifics. Remember everything. Who was there, where was it. If you were having awesome sex in the back of a car, and we all have, what did it smell like in there? Was it raining? What were you wearing? What did she smell like? Involve all your senses, it will help your mind to accept everything that is coming.
Whatever your situation, whatever you have chosen as your moment, remember everything. Try and see it through your closed eyelids. Put yourself in that moment. Touch her hair, play the shot, throw the pass. Don’t be afraid to feel stupid, just lose yourself in that moment.
Don’t just think about being there. Be there.
4. Soak it in
Go through every motion, recreate that moment in your mind, relive every single second you can. Feel the feels. Let it rush through your veins. Embrace that moment.
5. Pick the peak
Do you feel yourself smiling, your chest open and magic racing through your veins? It’s awesome isn’t it? Do you feel like you’re on top of the world? Now is your anchor moment.
6. Lock it in
Now the magic part, the weird part, but the magic part. Press your thumb and your forefinger together, firmly. Hold them there, pressed together. There is no set time, but 10 seconds should be plenty. Now release, enjoy your moment, come round slowly. Don’t rush this.
7. Test it
Go about your business for a while. Then later, hours later, press your thumb and finger together. Do you get that warm flood of emotions? Do you feel yourself smiling? Do you feel good? Awesome, it’s locked in and you have an NLP anchor.
If not, don’t worry, some people take longer to fix it. Just go back and start again, no biggy.
8. Stress test it
If it works, then the next time you’re stressed, or annoyed, try it again. If you can feel yourself instantly relax, and you will if you’ve done this right, then you have a new tool that can be used to devastating effect for almost anything.
9. Don’t let it go stale
You honestly shouldn’t want to. This is like a warm rush of endorphins just by touching your fingers together. Use your anchor repeatedly, it doesn’t run dry. In fact the more you use your NLP anchor, the stronger it gets.
Don’t just do it randomly, you might not get the best result, start to doubt it’s still working and get yourself in a negative feedback loop that ruins it. Enjoy it, take a quiet moment and just enjoy this genius little lifehack that will make you feel like a million bucks even on the worst day.
Once you’ve mastered this, you can set up different anchors, with different physical cues. You can really make each NLP anchor a specialist for business, the bedroom, speaking in public and more.
Start simple, though. Do one, do it well and do it now.